Awake..you've slept too long..(Pt. Four)

I picked him up from the train station the night he came back from his so called trip to see his family and took him to my house where he showered and we went to bed without really saying anything to each other after the drama that went down while he was out there...the next morning we talked about my insecurities and fears with him and how he just lied about that stupid stuff for no reason..I wanted him to start treating me with respect and thinking of my feelings as I have always done for him...he agreed to work on us and I agreed to work on my temper and try not to take the things I see on the internet out of hand. I took him to his mother's house where he claimed he lived kissed him Goodbye and I felt hope in us again if it was just for a minute. I truly did love this man with everything and wanted it to work for us both. Things did start to get better and he stopped coming on his page as much or not at.. I noticed that when we were not talking about the internet and all we were a pretty good couple. In the meantime he gave the woman her laptop and they broke ties off from each other..Why I would never understand why he did that but as the story goes on she is glad their friendship ended the way it did. Seeing he was trying to get another laptop on his own and I knew his Bday was coming up I decided to try and help him get one. I approached him with it but he wanted to pay for it and just have me get it on my account, I ask him how will you pay for it when you do not have a job.. I mean hell I had been paying his cell bill for months and helping him get that car fix when it was breaking down..he told me he would find a way to get me the money each month he could not have me buy him a laptop like that.. Ok so he was convincing so i helped him get it and the first month installment I took care of so they could ship it out... now all while this was going on he still wanted to keep some distance from me saying he thinks he needs to be single if just for a minute and my dumb butt so in love with him said I could be friends with him.. (NOT) right after I said that the damn laptop came in the mail and I started regretting doing it.. I mean that nudge kept being there in my side.. Like what the hell are you doing type of nudge. ..run the hell away from this blood sucker type of nudge...but of course what do we do when we are denial..we ignore it and keep enduring the bullshit. I fought myself on telling him that damn thing came but I lost because I let him come and take it... he was so excited about getting it was like he dropped everything to come see me then...SMDH I crave him so much just to be next to him I could not see what he was doing. Oh yeah after that he was all loving with me because he got what he wanted out of me..after he was out of my site and in his comfort zone where ever he was he got real cocky again with me and became aggressive with his feelings towards me all behind the PC or phone of course but when it came time to pay that phone or laptop bill he would be right on point with the kissing of the ass and tried to be my man again. I was such a sucker for this fool it was not even funny and it started bringing me down and affecting my health in a major way..he was so self absorbed he did not even notice it.. I would not sleep or eat for days worried about where he was and who he was with... I demanded he call me or text me or something.. I always had this feeling of something aint right because I was still acting like my cousin on the IM and I saw what he was saying to her telling her me and him broke up but he only dealt with me because we have some unfinished business to take care of.. Can you imagine how hard it was to keep all of that inside and play this game with him...to see in plain day how out cold and cold hearted this man I claimed to be so much in love with was making a fool out of me behind my back. He managed to come up with the money for one month installment for the laptop he told me he got the money from his sister.. it was always his sister or mother as the go to person when he would have new shit or bills paid... (found out different.. wait til the next part of this story). So I said ok maybe he is trying but it was all part of his plan to sink me deeper into trusting him to no end... I said he paid one month and that is all it was.. the laptop was a total of five payments when it was all said and done. Every month it was always a new story of why he can't pay so he called himself making a deal with me..check this out.. " Baby if I get the money for my cell can you do the computer this month"...This is me.. " Oh Yeah Baby I got you".. (How you going to make a deal with me on your shit..to pay your shit) His Birthday was approaching and so the laptop was not consider a gift as far as I was concerned since he claimed he was going to be paying me for it( I never mentioned the money again but I still wanted it back DAMNIT just because I did not say anything do not mean it was not still there).. I decided to do something special for him.. now we had kinda of sort been like broke up but still reaping the benefits of boyfriend girlfriend right.. meaning still having sex. Ok so thats not really broke up right..LOL Anyway I knew he always wanted to get another Tattoo and I had two myself and wanted another one so one weekend when he was over on our Saturday ( I called it) we went riding around trying to find a Tattoo place and the right picture he wanted one on his arm and me on my back. We did not get anywhere that day and the one shop we ran into was too high.. so he knew his sister was going to get one and he asked her about her place.. he was once again all excited and sent me pics of his sisters tattoo and I liked it and told him we can go check it out.. So that next Saturday we went...now I noticed from the time we got in the car he was on that phone just a texting... he knew that was a major pet peeva of mine because that shit is rude as hell and sneaky...he claimed it was his brother from Ohio and he was at work and could not be on his cell like that and they were talking about him coming there for his daugther's Baptist ism. I did not want to argue on ruining the day with what I thought it really was so I let it go.. I mean come on this man lie like it was a way of life very easy he did this without a blink. So we got to the Tattoo shop he knew just what he wanted and we both picked it out he went first.. he got two like Joker mask and I got a Butterfly.. but as I was getting mine he was over there sitting on the couch back to that damn texting again I mean and was really into it to.. I was getting pissed. As we were going back to my place he kept talking about this trip to his brother house and how his brother do not deal with anyone but him and he really wanted to go and show his support.. I am like thinking this Nigga trying to ask something without asking.. I am hip. So as time goes on he kept talking about this trip to Ohio and how he was going to get his sister to rent a car so he could go.. now he would always bring shit up like that too me and around me knowing I will be like Baby you don't have to ask your sister I can get the car you.. (Such a dumb ass I was), He was like Naw Baby I will try to get it.. I said ok and left it alone..then a couple of days later it was his sister cant get it on the card can you do it and I will pay for it..now you know how this went.. Yeah Baby I can get the car on my card for you.. I mean this was my man what women would not do for their MAN right beside I did not want to look like the one that could not get him to his brother thing. So I did it..he was all excited about that wanted to go get him some shorts for the visit because he claimed he did not have any..only one pair.. so of course I offered to do that also seeing I did not want him going down there looking all homely..I mean just like a man would do for his woman to make her look good I wanted my MAN to look good too.. he was just down on his luck right now and I mean really he was trying.. ( I think LOL) I gots to laugh doing this story because it keeps me from crying.. it does. So anyway the day came for him to get ready for his weekend trip... I went to get him from some cousin's house.. (Stay tuned for this one).. I thought it was strange how he was going in and out of the house while I waited in the car like he lived there or something (It use to burn him up how close attention I pay to things.. Well I would not be who I am now if I did not)..because he brought his bag to the car and was like wait a minute I forgot something and went in thru the front and came out the back like he was locking up the house...HIS house.. I ask him who's house is this and he was like my cousin's house and I said where is your car... he was like I am letting my niece keep it so she can get back and forth to work...he always used that excuse when his car would up and disappear also...I thought you are a really.. really..really nice uncle... Shittttttttt...So we left that place to go to my place where he spent the night with me so we could get up and do the rental car thing before I go in to work...we thought after we get the car we may have time to stop and get him a couple of pair of shorts also. We had it all planned for his weekend get away..but something still did not sit well with me and it started when I went to that house to pick him up. He talked about how his brother was so excited to see him and how they have not seen each other for a while. After we made love I fell a sleep quick but he did not..he stayed up watching TV but he was texting again.. I looked up and said what are you doing and he said I am texting my brother about tomorrow while he is at work. So I laid back down but here is the really weird part... he came to bed with his phone something he never did.. and was like keeping it upon the window like he was waiting on a call in the middle of the damn night.. I act like I was sleep because I am a very light sleeper when I want to be and listened and waited as he did... and then all of a sudden he grabs his phone slides out the bed like I can't feel or hear him.. and he goes to the bathroom first and then he leaves the bathroom and goes into my office..I knew what he was doing (TEXTING) BUT I could not move.. I could not get my ass out that bed.. I was stuck..I was numb.. I could not move... when he came back to bed I was like what you doing he said nothing I thought my phone went off. YEAH fucking right!!!! Here is me..Oh ok Baby.. I love you and him.. Love you too....The next morning we got up and went to the car rental place..my card did not go thru at the first place and for some reason I panic ed and was like Baby we are going to get this car we went back to my house and I rush to find another car place that would accept my card..it was like I was trying to prove myself to him..he waited patiently why I did all of this crazy ass running around for HIM all trying to make it to work on time so he can make it to HIS shit. Anyway we got the car did not have time to get the shorts..we kiss Good Bye and he was off for his weekend and oh I slip him a little something for gas since he mentioned about borrowing money from his SISTER again..I pretty much knew he only had his unemployment check which was not much because of all his kids he had...I wanted him to be straight.. (Just like taking care of a kid aint it not a grown ass man). That weekend was a long one for me but he seem better then he did the last time he went out of town he called me on point and I tried not to bother him this time to much..I tried to really trust him..I cleaned my house all weekend and I noticed something while cleaning my room.. I had got these sex gel liquids you know for oral sex for us to use and one of the flavors was missing.. I kinda of dismissed it but not at the same time..(Keep this in a mental note folks). Anyway the day he came back was Father's day and he called me on his way in and let me know he will be to my house in the morning to drop the car off... I was cool. After that weekend he seem to be acting better with me and him and it lasted like a couple of weeks then one weekend he came over and was like we need to talk... He was I am going to move out to Ohio..it has been a year since I have worked and this is not like me and my uncle offered me a job out there as his accounting or something like that.. I was like Oh wow your going to move out there and he was like just until I can get back on my feet but I will be back and forth since my kids are still here.. I was shocked but there was nothing I could really say he made up his mind then he went to saying about how a old girlfriend had once told him I love you enough to let you go.. I was like what he was trying to break it off again .. I was out done... I went and sat in my living room and cried I was like nothing I do or say NOTHING this man do not love me and I dont think he never did or will I have been a damn fool all this time and he has been playing on it also.. it was harsh but I got sad and mad at the same time..he felt that and dropped the whole subject never to mention it for a minute the following weeks was a rough one for us and I started noticing things on his page again...one woman out stood more then all with her "Hey DADDY" and "Spank me DADDY" comments and "Thank you for everything you know what I am talking about" and in I would like to welcome...MISS P herself...she broke the mold and open a whole new can of worms on the real.. I never could imagine what her story would bring to me and neither did he or any of you...Next part The Beginning leading to the END ( Oh Yeah its a lot more of this bullshit and more then anyone could imagine)..Stay Tuned